Whenever you're starting to despair about the impersonal mediocrity of West End dining, drop into Joe Allen. While my previous WC2 experiences were about appalling service and glorified fast food, Joe Allen thankfully brought me back to a classic world of classic food and well-trained staff.
Even visually, Joe Allen's elegance shines through. It's like the basement version of Frankie and Johnny's - possibly the best steakhouse in the world. You enter through a discreetly marked doorway, descend a flight of aged wooden stairs (with proper brass handrails) and enter a comforting world of vintage theatre posters and tantalizing meaty smells. Be it the height of the British summer (commonly known as 'that Thursday in July'), you still feel like you've somehow wandered into a timeless and isolated world of perpetual evening.
If there is a flaw, it's that the menu is slightly too eclectic. Rather than focusing on steak, steak and more types of steak, Joe Allen has opened up the floodgates to a chicken here, a lamb cutlet there, a pork belly here and, disturbingly, only one steak on the menu. They even dangerously venture into offering spare ribs - flaunting commonly held wisdom on the subject (1. Never get ribs outside of the US, and, if you can help it, from outside a red state. 2. Never get ribs if they're the only barbecue on the menu. If they can't crack sausages, they've got no business with ribs. 3. If there's no smoker, there's no barbecue.).
Still, although the lack of specialisation is disconcerting, the food is still delicious (except for the ribs, I've never tried them, and not vouching for them. There's a principle here). The sirloin is great (although it's worth swapping the fries for their mashed potatoes) and the grilled, corn-fed chicken is a heaping platter of juicy, well-grilled poultry.
The single best thing on the menu isn't. In one of the worst-kept secrets of West End dining, Joe Allen serves one of the best hamburgers I've ever eaten. For some reason not listed - perhaps in a (successful) bid to create in-crowd loyalty - it is a phenomenal dining experience. It's a smaller burger than, for example, Hamburger Union, and if they use Free Trade, Grass Fed, Locally Kept, Organic, GMO Free, Ethical Cattle Bought With an AMEX Red, they don't say (possibly a benefit of being off the menu). But it is a triumph of an experienced chef and well-trained service - they even ask how you want your burger cooked, bucking the recent disturbing trend to the contrary. The meat is juicy and very tasty - the bacon is crispy and understated, and the vegetable garnishes are fresh, substantial and even delivered on the side without asking. They also, again, simple genius from a talented kitchen, grill the bun briefly before serving, adding a satisfying buttery crispiness.
The staff are equally confident and convincing in all other aspects of the meal - happy to help you make decisions and unwavering in the face of gluttonous side orders (my 'sirloin with sides of macaroni and mashed potatoes' raised eyebrows at the table, but the waitress never missed a beat). They've even mastered the trick of looking supportive when you order the cheapest wine on the menu and can manage to look at diners without derision when they're clearly amateurish with the tasting. (Perhaps my own idiosyncrasies are showing through...)
Perhaps the greatest compliment I can give, is that, while writing this, I was genuinely surprised to discover that there were multiple locations. And, after thinking about it, I'm damn glad there are. Joe Allen has actually captured the feel of a classic, neighborhood steak restaurant - just a shame there aren't more steaks on the menu.
Joe Allen
13 Exeter Street
London
WC2E 7DT
0207 836 0651
www.joeallenrestaurant.com
The Bite: Brilliance over, above and off the menu.
I think there is a whole world of ribs and barbeque sauce that I'm missing out on. I never realised such rib rules existed.
As for Joe Allen's I remember going there ages ago but have almost forgotten it existed. Perhaps it's time for a revisit...
Posted by: Picklin paul | October 17, 2006 at 01:19 PM
There's also the well-known but seldom voiced 'if the cook is white, it ain't bbq'.
Julia will probably pipe in with a 'Rich Davis [KC Masterpiece] proves that true!'.
Posted by: Jared | October 17, 2006 at 06:33 PM
Nice post Jared. And one I almost entirely concur with this time. The only thing is part of me is a wee bit disappointed that it's a 'chain'. Not because I don't want everyone to enjoy the burger, but cos I kinda liked its one-off off the beaten track nature.
And can I also plug the wine list? The Zinfandel goes very well with the burgers. Is there a wine blog you can do a joint promotion with as well as Picklin' Paul?
Posted by: Lebowski | October 17, 2006 at 06:45 PM
Nice post Jared. And one I almost entirely concur with this time. The only thing is part of me is a wee bit disappointed that it's a 'chain'. Not because I don't want everyone to enjoy the burger, but cos I kinda liked its one-off off the beaten track nature.
And can I also plug the wine list? The Zinfandel goes very well with the burgers. I wonder if there's a wine blog you can do a joint promotion with as well as Picklin' Paul?
Posted by: Lebowski | October 17, 2006 at 06:45 PM
That's a good idea, Mr. Idea Man. Do we know anyone in our ever-increasing network of blogging? What about Paul, being the Kevin Bacon of the blogging world?
I'm still waiting for the 'Carnivore Culture' entry from all three of you.
Posted by: Jared | October 17, 2006 at 06:50 PM
The Six Degrees of Paul Colman? Like it.
I'm working on mine. Think it could become a separate blog in its own right if I got off my arse and did it.
Posted by: Lebowski | October 18, 2006 at 10:31 AM
I'm working on mine too. Currently I think it could have its own sentence.
Jared - I'd really like to do a ribs and BBQ sauce tasting (with or without wine) as I feel I'm missing out on at least 60% of the references on this blog. Any advice on sourcing sauces?
Posted by: Picklin paul | October 18, 2006 at 12:45 PM
I've got about four or five varieties here already.
Actually, I could get more fairly quickly - why don't I host a tasting?
Posted by: Jared | October 18, 2006 at 12:59 PM
That is a great idea. Count me in meatman
Posted by: Lebowski | October 18, 2006 at 01:08 PM
Though I'm pledged against ribs, I'd be interested in a tasting.
'Carnivore Culture' - is that my dead dog thing?
(I must say I'm thoroughly enjoying the new 'meat man' typepad experience.)
Posted by: Colman | October 18, 2006 at 11:39 PM